I feel like it should have poured today.
Sometimes I wonder if everything is always worth it.
If its worth it to search for someone to spend my life with.
Especially if it means hurting like this when its wrong.
Sometimes I’m not sure how I’m even supposed to keep feeling.
Should I be angry, or sad? Or am I not supposed to feel anything at all?
I know eventually I’ll feel like this was worth it.
Like I didnt just screw myself and like I didnt just rip myself open.
But right now I feel like it should have poured today.
Raindrops falling from the sky to match the tears that kept feeling my eyes.
I dont know anything anymore, not now.
Nothing feels right and nothing feels whole.
Theres a sinking feeling in my chest and it isn’t fading.
Its like something really fell apart in there.. and he broke it.
But I guess its my own fault, for dragging this out so long.
I held on for something that’s never going to happen..
And now I’m so lost.
